On the Hour, S2E2, 30 April 1992.

It's been confirmed that Ireland has burst. The cockatoo-shaped landmass blew open along the southwest coast, squirting millions of tonnes of noxious fluid into the Atlantic Ocean.

The troubelshooter Red Adair, who was dropped into the area to tie up the ends, has not been seen for over six hours, and experts say the colossal pressure of the flow may well have prevented him from knotting two peninsulas effectively.

It's understood that American naval forces are standing by to tow the stricken isle out to sea, where it will be bombed and sunk as quickly as possible.